The only way is up…that is how I felt last week. Well, I hoped that was the case. Cause I don’t know whether I could cope with much more.
And really, relatively, it is not a lot, compared with a lot of people.
But I was really struggling.
For almost three weeks I have been using two crutches. That means no hands. Which means, I cannot carry a coffee mug around the house. Very hard to carry any objects. Keep picking the crutches off the floor because they fall down. No matter HOW you try prop them up! Seriously, a design is needed here for keeping-up-crutches-so-they-don’t-fall-down.
But. This was not the hardest part.
I have not driven. Yes, I have ultimately lost my independence. The up side is that I have had amazing friends and family taking me to and from work. The down side, I couldn’t just go to the shop to grab that chocolate I so desperately NEEDED.
Restricted play with my children
This has been one of the hardest parts. I am an active individual – a bit of an understatement I think. And a very active, lively parent. I can’t sit on the floor. I can’t sit on a chair with my legs up. I am uncomfortable for sitting for long periods of time.
And I’m grumpy. Not a good combination. I can’t piggy back my kids to bed, or dive on them to tickle them.
Or drive them to school.
I hate to feel helpless…but then it made me realise something else…a good lesson to take home in this rock bottom place.
The hardest part
I thought the hardest part (after having an operation to repair my hamstring tendon) would be not running. However, I have learnt (or am trying to learn…it is still a journey) that WHO I am is important. Not, what I do. Which is really hard for a “do-er” type person.
What has helped?
Time. Patience. Sharing my frustration with friends, in particular, that have gone or going through similar circumstances. Cause they KNOW where I am. And I was reminded
This too shall pass